I am blessed - a lot. I look around at the life LD and I live and am in awe of where God has placed us and all he has entrusted in our care. We have two beautiful, healthy little girls. We have a precious little boy on the way. LD has a job that he enjoys and provides abundance for our family. I love our new home and truly love our neighborhood. I love the church we attend and the friends God has placed in our lives. I am blessed.
I know that others cannot say the same right now in their life and this pregnancy has caused me to be very aware of the pain of friends around me. As I carry this healthy little boy that we prayed for I cannot help but think about a sweet friend who lost her baby at 16 weeks in utero for no medical reason. I think about our dear friends who daily live in heartache for their son who was taken from this world at age 6 - 8 short months ago. My heart is heavy for a friend who has been unable to have children of her own and waits daily to get a call that a mother has chosen her to adopt their baby. I wait anxiously with friends who are on an adoption waiting list, waiting for two little children from Ethiopia.
This joy that I have of carrying this sweet child has caused others pain - simply by being. I know that not one of those friends desires to feel heartache. Today I read 1 Peter 2:19 "For it is commendable if someone bears up under the pain of unjust suffering beacause they are conscious of God." Not one of those individuals would choose the pain they have suffered in order to be commendable.
I live with a small fear, a fear I fight with daily. In the back of my mind I am always wondering "when will the other shoe drop?" "when is God going to give me my test of faith?" I know in my heart that my God does not work like that. Romans 8:28 says that God works all things together for GOOD for those who love him, and I know that, so why do I fight this fear?
We live in such a broken world and the heartache is so great. Today I choose to be thankful for the blessings God has placed in my life, be aware of the pain that surrounds me and be faithful to lift up those in heartache. I also choose today to trust that my God is good, even though the world is broken, He is faithful.
3 comments:
i too lead a very, very blessed life. most of the time i know it. but like you, sometimes feel like i'm waiting for that shoe to drop. my heart aches for people i know who are going thru terrible times. and i wonder when it's going to happen to me. so thank you friend for the reminder to stop and be thankful for what i have in the here and now and know that the future is in control of the God of EVERYTHING. good and bad. and whatever happens, He will be with me.
Love you friend. You know what's strange, is that I had that same waiting for the other shoe to drop feeling when I found out we were pregnant. Seriously, I said those exact words to Todd when we found out. But I've since come to realize, like you said, God doesn't work that way. I honestly don't think He does - we just live in a world that is broken, where bad things happen. And living in fear is allowing Satan to steal your joy. Even in the midst of sadness, there is so much joy to be found, even if it takes awhile to see it.
I am so excited to meet your little boy. We love you guys!
Love this Melissa! You are such a beauitful person. So unbelieveably excited for you guys. God is good!
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