Normal days for me are crazy and hectic, but every night when I settle into bed, I have peace. I may have a bad day, but I know who I am, why I am here, and that I am loved completely and fully.
In the last few weeks, I really struggled to quiet my heart. I just have felt an unsettling, an unrest that would not let up. It was beginning to affect my parenting, my relationships, my attitude and my days. I knew I needed to find the peace that I had known so well.
I decided to unplug myself from the world for a time. I de-activated facebook, stopped reading blogs, and started focusing on the things I knew to be true in my life. I didn't do it for any reason but to re-focus myself, but what I gained was so much more.
This verse came to mind a few days ago and it resonated so deeply with me. "Whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable - if anything is excellent or praiseworthy - think about such things." Philippians 4: 7-9
Our family drove to Michigan last week to celebrate Thanksgiving and decided on a whim to drive through the night on the way home. LD drove from midnight til 7 and he was fading fast. I took over with a huge coffee in hand and he was fast asleep in the back seat. The car was incredibly quiet as we drove through the mountains and the sun was just starting to wake up. The sky was a beautiful pink color - and it happened - my peace was back.
It was almost as if God chuckled and said "Did you forget how big I was?! Did you forget that I wake the sun every morning without fail? Did you forget that I am fully and completely in control?"
Its so easy to lose focus. It breaks my heart to think that people believe God set up rules for us to follow as bondage. His rules offer so much freedom! If I choose to live as Philippians 4 says and think only on things that are true, noble, right, pure, lovely, admirable - and ONLY those things, I have freed myself from carrying weight on my shoulders that was never meant to be there.
I still will have bad days, crazy mornings, bad parenting moments, and once in a while I may go to bed with unrest - but I have no doubt that I was bought with a price and am loved completely and fully.